good golly, i am sick. flu for the 3rd time in two years – I’ve never been sick so often as I have since I moved here. And we have tix to go see “cake” play tonight at the astoria – fuck. Part of me is absolutely determined to go, since I missed them the last time they came through London, and there really aren’t very many american groups I care about that put on shows here. The other part of me is alternately sweaty and freezing and thoroughly achy, especially my hips and lower back, and says “who the hell do you think you are kidding? you are too sick to even enjoy it.” I’m taking baby steps around the house like a little old lady with a blanket wrapped around me, and I think I should go to a concert?

Plus, we leave in less than a week, and I was supposed to pack this weekend – I have to pack in advance, then re-pack just before, eliminating the stuff I am never going to actually need or wear whilst we are away. Otherwise I end up lugging along 7 pairs of shoes, and a bunch of assorted other non-essentials.

When I am sick I really miss certain things from the states. Proper medicine – the strongest stuff here has paracetamol [tylenol] and decongestant, everything else has menthol and glycerine, neither of which is an actual drug. I want dextromethorphan and antihistamines – I want robitussin and nyquil and shit to knock me out at night, suppress coughs, clear my sinuses. I miss MTV – something fluffy and cheesy and ridiculously entertaining. I miss my comfort foods – last night i didn’t want to eat anything except marshmallows, and sweet j went all the way to the grocery store and got me some, but they didn’t do the trick as they were too soft and too sweet, and fucking raspberry flavoured. I miss my *things*, all the stuff that’s sitting in in my sister’s basement in boxes. Sometimes I feel like my life here is like camping – making do with what’s available, stripped down to the bare minimum.

Most of the time, it doesn’t bother me, but when I am really sick, I just want comfort, not to feel like I am just getting by. Okay, feverish whinging over…

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