every once in a while, you remember the stuff that really matters. you run across something that reminds you about how you want to live your life, about how you could live more in the moment, be more aware and present in daily life, about how you wish you could throw off the restrictions and trappings of everyday existence and be truly happy and free.

a few years ago, i made a list called “101 things to do before i die”. some people have other types of lists: 43 things and 101 things in 1001 days. me, i have 101 things to do before i die.

the point of my list is not to accomplish them all. it’s not to cross things off, so that i can say i’ve lead an interesting life or to do lots of daredevil things. some of them are things which are not within my control to achieve. they’re not the most profound things. they’re not even that interesting to most. that’s not the point.

the point is simply this: to remind myself never to get complacent. to never take stuff for granted, and to never allow myself the luxury of regret. it is my reminder that life is too short. i will likely never cross them all off, and i could die tomorrow. it may sound morbid to think that way, but i find it enormously freeing. because it strips you of all ego. the things i do in this life are only of consequence in so much as they affect other’s lives. this is what will remain if i get hit by a bus tomorrow: how well did i treat people yesterday? was i kind? did i tell them i loved them?

steve jobs gave a commencement speech to stanford university, where he said:

Remembering that I’ll be dead soon is the most important tool I’ve ever encountered to help me make the big choices in life. Because almost everything — all external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure – these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.

it’s easy to remember here and now. not so easy to remember when i get irritated and bored and lazy in life. not always so easy to reconcile when my choices are self-serving.

but i try.

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