i haven’t been to the states for a visit in a year and a half, and probably won’t be for several months yet.

it’s the longest i’ve been away, and i’m kind of homesick.

i want to drive – fast. i want to hang out with my family in my brother’s kitchen and eat american-style chinese food while the kids run riot. i want good salads the size of my head and fluffy towers of pancakes and uber-hip coffee houses. i want grocery stores full of 18 different toothpaste brands and 23 kinds of bread. i want clothes i know the sizes of, where i still fit into single digits. i want inexpensive shoes that i can wear in good weather.

i want space and nature and dryers where the towels come out as soft as clouds and college radio stations with gritty underground fabulous bands i’ve never heard of. i want greenbeans that don’t come pre-packaged, pre-trimmed and shipped from south africa. i want lactose free milk and cheese that doesn’t taste like moldy wax. i want my friends that know me inside and out, who i can call just because and say “remember when?” to. i want crappy brash sitcoms and over-produced slick dramas. i want to see fake white straight aesthetically pleasing smiles beaming at me everywhere i look. i want mountains and trees. i want to hear “have a nice day” until it makes me scream.

doesn’t matter that i’ll be sick of it all in a week’s time. right now, nothing else will do.

wilco – hate it here

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